We’re moving on.  Time, hasn’t exactly been a friend this fall.   It keeps ticking and the sense of loss seems to hover.  Rebecca asked me today how many times I have “packed up”, in the past three years.  One, two, three, four, five and now

six.  Each time it’s been necessary.  Well, packing is always necessary if you’re moving.   Or if someone you love is moving and you have taken on the task of helping.

Packing, stuff and memories

is hard work and tiring for the heart, soul and body.  I’m not one to hold on, to time and things because of memories, nostalgia and the temptation to Not Let Go.

Nevertheless, looking ahead to what needs to be done, considering what has been and what will be

reminds me of

One Step at a time.  One bite at a time.

How Do you eat an elephant?

One.  Bite.  At.  A. Time.  This most recent packing up of things has not been the biggest, heaviest, most burdensome.  It loomed though.  I wondered where the energy,  will, joy, would come from.  I doubted I would cheerfully manage the doing of it.  In it, through it, He has been present.  Circumstances being what they are, I have often bowed, asking for strength, courage and joy in doing.  God has given strength, abundant, in miraculous ways, over ticking time,

often.

Corrie Ten Boom has been a voice of wisdom and peace and in her life’s journey full of hardship and trouble, she has breathed those, wisdom and peace, into my life.  God’s purpose for her was, among other things, to talk to me even though we did not ever meet.

I burst into tears, “I need you!” I sobbed. “You can’t die! You can’t!” “Corrie,” he began gently. “When you and I go to Amsterdam, when do I give you your ticket?” “Why, just before we get on the train.” “Exactly. And our wise Father in heaven knows when we’re going to need things, too. Don’t run out ahead of him, Corrie. When the time comes that some of us will have to die, you will look into your heart and find the strength you need – just in time.”

There are no ‘if’s’ in God’s kingdom. His timing is perfect. And no places that are safer than other places. The center of His will is our only safety. His will is our hiding place. Let us pray that we may always know it. “Lord Jesus, keep me in Your will. Don’t let me go mad by poking about outside it.”

So, God blessed me, once again, with strength to pack and wisdom to make the Doing happen.  I packed but not alone.  Rebecca stepped right up to the task and did what needed doing.  She packed and hauled.  She sorted and disposed of things.  This is the end of the beginning of her adult life.  The future is uncertain of course, even in the gift she has received.   A new opportunity.  There is joy in looking ahead and she has faced the sadness of saying good bye. Seldom does good come alone.  Rarely do we escape sad and hard, in the  turning to a new chapter.  The sweetness of happy anticipation cannot sidestep the sadness of ending what has been.  She has worked hard and poured herself into the job God gave her.  She said to me just a few weeks ago, “He has guided me, clearly, in every step to this point and I know He isn’t going to leave me on my own now”.  Learning to lean

on God

is a lesson of eternal value and gives meaning to life here and now.

In the days of packing up her home there was time to spare and we walked and ate and yes, even drank coffee.  We hauled, to the dump and the Salvation Army.  We folded and taped and washed and vacuumed.

The people who bought the little half house in Ottawa didn’t want the washing machine and dryer in the basement.   It was our job to find a new home for both and I did spend more than a few minutes wondering,  what, where, who?  We conferred, we two girls and the decision was made to give them away.  We couldn’t risk having to take care of the moving of them and she advertised them and within minutes the requests began to roll in.  Pick me, I want them, I need them.  In the next few hours there was a steady stream of answers to the ad and her hard thing was to decide, Who.  She did, decide and a man with two children came with a truck and the washer and dryer went to a new home. It was a win for him and a win for us.  Blessing comes wrapped in all sorts of giving and receiving.  That giving, solved a dilemma for us and blessed someone else.  In the end, there was blessing all ’round.

My little one, independent and becoming more so.  It’s inevitable and we encouraged it. I’m watching, on my knees.  She lives her life and it intersects with mine.   She is strong and I pray that the strength will have just a bit of weakness in it.   A recognition of need, for her Saviour.

Back in October when Nano was on her way Home, I told you that somewhere, back, she had become more than my mother.  She had become my friend.  Oh, she was my mother til the end and I will always be mother to this girl and I’m watching close and shouldn’t be surprised to see God working it out, His will for her good.  He isn’t dragging us with Him. He is patient and kind and He’s giving us time, to learn from each other and grow in wisdom as we see Him working it out.  Life.  The walk is full of potholes to maneuver and we are more than managing.  We are setting our minds on doing it well.  Not because we are good at maneuvering.  Because He is great at it and we are staying close.

Just before we left my sister’s house two months ago and headed for the funeral home for Nano’s official Good Bye, I was preparing,  my heart, soul and body.  God was there.  I had dreaded that day for much of my life.   He had handed me the necessary ticket at His chosen moment.  Perfect timing.  As always.  I stood in the bathroom and Becky came quietly behind me.  “Mom, can I pray for you?”  She did and she mentioned in that prayer that God knew about all of Nano’s moves.  Especially her move to Heaven.  It was true of course and in those few words spoken by my child, His child, I felt His arm around me.  His strong right arm, around Nano’s going and my staying and my girl’s watching.  He was in all of it.

This is what the Lord says—
    your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel:
“I am the Lord your God,
    who teaches you what is best for you,
    who directs you in the way you should go.  (Isaiah 48:17)  

He doesn’t teach me more than I am ready to learn.  He doesn’t tell me what’s coming next.  He wants me to face the challenges as they come and not to fret.

Father, keep me in your will.

So here we are, taking a break, visiting Montreal for no reason other than, the packing is done and we are waiting for the movers to come and we decided it would be fun. There’s a moving truck coming and boxes to be sorted and some are going to one place and some are going to a different place and Christmas is coming and that’s reason for praise and wonder.  There are people to talk to and friends to sit across from and faucets to fix and fences to mend.

We walked today, once we had found our hotel.  She’s a good navigator and I am not.  The air is crisp and the sun has been shining.  We had coffee, again.   We are sitting and this hotel room, a beauty, is filled with sweet music.    Now and again my heart flutters at thinking of all that needs to be done.  Resting is rather illusive.

There is pleasure in the moments.  In the work done and still needing to be done, we have seen His loveliness.  His gift of, time together, working together, traveling, living.  He gives the strength we need, “just in time” and He gives so much more than just what is necessary.  Of course we won’t be eating elephants.  If however, elephant was on the menu, we would eat it just one bite at a time so as not to be overwhelmed by the size of what was to come.

Tonight, we are tired and thankful.  He is good.