Here’s what I’m thinking today!  ?

Fear of pain seems to be inherent in most of us.  But maybe Learning fear is a real thing too.   Healthy fear isn’t a bad thing.   I mean, even when we are babies our parents warn us of danger with “hot” “scary” “ouch” and some of us even thought it was okay to smack a tiny person’s hand (or even a bum) to help them understand that pain is something to shy away from.  God talks about fear too. Healthy fear. Like

Proverbs 9:10 fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom.

I remember the summer that an already powerful fear of bees jumped a couple of levels, to terror.  I was in the back seat of the car on a particularly hot summer day.  Papa had just attached the trailer to the hitch on our 1968, (not sure what it was but I’m pretty sure it would be classified as a boat in 2017) car.   So I was getting my dolls and my Nancy Drew books and maybe even a couple of Trixie Beldon, organized on the big bench seat, when to my horror I heard a loud buzzing sound coming from

behind me.  Not actually behind me, but on my back.  Under my shirt.  The first prick, or sting, came about 2 seconds after I started screaming.  The next two stings were inflicted right about the time my dear dad started smacking my back trying to kill the thing.  I know, it sounds like cruelty, to both me and the bee, but in the moment, he was doing his best to save me from more trauma.  Well, he got it and I got three stings and if anybody tells you a bumble bee can only sting once, I’m here to tell you, that is false.  So, for the next twenty some odd years, I had a mini panic attack if I so much as heard a distant bzzzzzzz and I’m just not sure yay fear was a healthy one.

For a while, around that time, we lived in a part of Alberta that pretty much bordered B.C.  We were surrounded by farmers and their crops and one of Those farmers was a bee guy. I mean, that’s what he did. Bees!  Honey!  One day we went to visit and he gave us a lesson on honey bees. He told us that bees don’t want to sting but they will if necessary. He proved his point by picking up one of the bees in one hand and took papa’s hand in his other hand. He then squeezed that bee’s behind until it had no choice but to drop its stinger, right. Into. Papa’s. Finger.  The shock and horror I felt was like an electric current as Papa “ouched” and “winced” and grabbed his hand. Then the bee guy showed us that the stinger was still stuck and needed to be removed. He took care of that and I learned a lot that day and even while I watched Papa in pain, I started to learn about pain that hurts but doesn’t need to have worry and fear attached to the hurt.

Now that middle age has embraced me, (even if I have not quite reciprocated) the world in all of it’s beauty and brightness has settled into a realistic pattern of joyful, happy, sad, pain and discomfort and everything in between.  Somehow, 58 years can do a lot to soften attitudes, reactions, judgements, impressions and they all become melded together, one painful event measured against another.   The weight of one experience balanced by the burden of another, the joy in a small thing, sweeter sometimes than a great big happy happening and when you step back for a minute or an hour and take a look, pain is manageable.

If only I had been more mature in the old early days, but that’s life.  We need to live it and feel it in order to know which pain is worth the energy of fearing and which pain isn’t

worth fearing.

I have learned a few things about bees these ten or so years just passed.  Yes, some of you have allergies and would be foolish to ignore them. There are also wasps and yellow jackets that can do some nasty work. But sometimes we are afraid of the potential sting and so, flap and swing and run and jump, doing the very things that frighten the bee to the point of needing to lash out to protect.  God made them so they could take care of themselves  and that’s what they do.  They aren’t predators.  Last summer I unknowingly (obviously) stepped on a nest of wasps and thankfully most of them were either sleeping or out foraging because I only received two stings.  Also Thankfully, my fear of bees and even pain, is minimal these days and no emotional damage was done.

This summer I have had and will have some opportunities to travel.  You know (because I’ve told you) that travel is not my very most favourite activity but I understand that visiting other places and peoples is good for me and is mostly a privilege.   Okay, it’s pretty much All privilege.  It’s also enjoyable and I think the reason I balk is that I’m just a bit lazy.

I told you about my friends Rudy and Sharon and I talked of honey from their hives.   Oh how I love a piece of crusty bread toasted (as opposed to warmed because if it isn’t toasted what’s the point really?)

Rebecca and I stayed at four different places on our recent trip to England, two of which had their own bee hives.   Just now Rob and I are staying at a place in England where once again, there are bee hives.  I didn’t know about these ones until I went for a walk this afternoon.  We have not had a moment of rain which is in itself something to be thankful for.   I took a winding path through a meadow and came upon a sign that said Beware! Bees! And sure enough, there they were

the hives and the bees and the buzzing and I stood quietly and watched them.   Have you read about bees?  You should, you know.   They, like every other creature God has created, are fearfully and wonderfully made.   Bees, perhaps even more fearfully and wonderfully than some others.  Their life’s work is laborious, at least.
Through him all things were made; without him nothing was made that has been made. (IJohn 1:3)

So right about now you’re asking yourself where I’m headed and if I’m in fact headed anywhere with this report on bees and me and other meandering thoughts.

Nowhere!  I’m headed nowhere. Just doing some rambling and

the bees are pretty cool, guys.  They help to make beautiful flowers too.  I guess if there is to be anything worth reflecting on in this story, it’s this.

A)  Pain isn’t often worth anticipating.  In worrying about it, we’ll miss the beauty and the gift in the Right Now.   I have feared so many things in the years and now I’m starting to look back and it’s changing how I look forward.  We talk about not dwelling on the past but really, taking a look at it is a good teaching tool for how to do what’s ahead.

B). Oh and I Guess I would like you to consider some things you are afraid of and think about not being afraid of them/it anymore.

Today, bees.  ?

oh ya and one more thing!

How sweet are Your words to my taste! Yes, sweeter than honey to my mouth!(PS119:103)

Tomorrow we’re going home and yet again, I’ve seen and inhaled deeply.

?